I don’t go out of my way to either frequent or avoid cemeteries, but today I find myself sitting in one. The kids are in sweet slumber in the backseat of the car and I needed a place to pull over and browse the web. This cemetery just happened to be the most convenient spot for that. At least it was until I pulled in, parked and then realized I didn’t have any service out here!

quiet cemetery on a rainy day

So rather than wasting time scouring craigslist for a new home I’m sitting here amongst the dead. Which is odd for me considering my absolute fear of death. I wonder if the spirits that once animated the decaying bones beneath this fertile earth have gone on to be reborn in new bodies; or are they clutching ferociously to a memory of their precious lives past, unwilling to accept their mortality?

I think that my spirit would certainly be clutching onto something, were I beneath this beautiful grass, hearing echoes of life only a few taunting feet above me. I look at my sweet little girl in the backseat and attempt to accept that there will be a day that she will not be in this world anymore. There will come a day when I am not here to watch her and embrace her. My mind realizes this fact and the now quiet shells of once living humans that lie buried in this cemetery confirms it, but neither my heart nor my spirit could ever accept it.

I’ll try not to spend too much more time in cemeteries.