Your app is a piece of shit.

It’s not going to change the world, or my life, or anyone else’s life. It’s a stupid little web app that is a rip-off (oh sorry, a re-hashing) of someone else’s failed ideas. You are not original and your software is not revolutionary. So stop writing job posts that go something like this:

Ruby ROCKSTARS Wanted

Want to change the world? Want to be part of an amazing team of rockstars that are working on the next social network that will revolutionize the way people use the web and connect with each other? Do you want to work for a well-funded (not profitable, highly likely to fall on its ass) startup? We offer a hip working environment with free soda (until our investors start to lose faith in our meaningless cause) and 30 inch apple cinema displays! If you are obsessive about testing and know how to get things done (we don’t stop until we drop) and you’ll work for equity, then we’ll take your soul. Promptly.

Here is what I have to say to you fucking idiots. Your app is a piece of shit. Want me to say it again? PIECE OF SHIT. It is so rare that anyone is inventive enough to come up with a truly original or really good idea. Which is why equity is a retard penalty. The only idea you should believe in enough to work for free for (or for low salary) is YOUR OWN IDEA.

The web app market is saturated. I feel soggy every time I use my computer. There are too many of them and most of them are fucking useless. Some of them might be kind of neat, or interesting for a few days but they are really very useless in the long run, unless you are a specialist and you need a specific app for a very specific application. We don’t need more social networking. We don’t need more twitters, facebooks, assbooks, myspaces, social gaming communities, cancer survivor networks, parenting networks, book lover networks, cat lover networks, youtubes, or googles.

Thousands of software devs have been having fun working for all these well-funded startups that eventually fail. But at what point will they realize that the world only needs so many stupid web applications? We keep waiting for the next best app, but when does the river run dry? There are only so many good ideas and I think we might be hitting the limiter for social networking-ish apps.

What ever happened to writing software that actually does things and fixes real problems? Do people do that anymore? We don’t need more reasons to waste away in front of our computer screens. We need reasons to stand up because we’ve been sitting down a lot and we’ve taken a political, social, economical, and spiritual beating. In the words of the great Bob Marley, “Get up, stand up; stand up for your rights…. life is your right.” Perhaps we wouldn’t be such a dumb, placated culture if we actually left our houses and talked to people in RL, YO.